Human-doing


Hi there, I’v traveled home from Ireland – Canada for 5 weeks to visit family. This is the first time I’ve ever been able to travel and work as well. It’s not paying the bills yet but it’s fun that that’s a reality for me now!
(sorry in advance for how rambley this is)
I had pre-prepared a lot of reels for instagram – they were in the ‘drafts’ section – all I would have to do while i was gone was press upload each day. That was going to be me providing consistent value and stay consistent with my social media while I was gone. I knew I wasn’t really going to spend a lot of time creating content etc. while here.
BUT the first week I was here my instagram crashed and I had to re-install the app and lost all of the video and prepared content.
Super disappointed. I thought I might make an attempt to recreate them but with moving around and dodgy internet at times and being active in the activities of my holiday – it hasn’t happened. I’m telling myself these are just excuses.
I then started to question whether there would be some other way that I could continue to stay consistent – there probably would be but I didn’t do anything about that.
SO I haven’t replaced the social media content – but I think about it almost every day – feeling like I should be doing more. I need to replace the content but not actually taking any action on that.
Then I question – is it really a problem that I don’t have consistent content during this time?
It always feels like I’m comparing myself to something I heard someone say before about the “right” way of doing things. In this case I think “what would Brooke do?” I feel like Brooke would have figured out a way to create consistent content again.
And so the problem with my not doing that, I thought would be that I would fear my business would fail. But it’s not. It’s actually my proving to myself that I’m not the kind of person who can accomplish/ achieve large goals/ big things.
i.e. someone else is better than me and they would have figured this out and done it better. That’s the kind of person who succeeds. I’m not.
And perhaps to avoid that feeling of being worthless or inferior – the answer is to do more. If I do more or create more that will prove that I’m a worthy person – of course though, I don’t actually do more I just think about doing more…which achieves less.
Any ways – as I’m sure you can tell I’m still just working through all of this and would like some help figuring it out.
Thanks