My husband recently took our 3 kids on a brief weekend trip and I stayed behind. I chose to stay behind because they were going to a baseball game, which I didn’t really care about, and also I had been working really hard on the Covid front lines and I really needed a break and time to myself to recuperate. I was looking forward to my weekend away and they wound up having a great time. Win, win, right? You would think so, but my brain is instead making me feel inadequate. I am noticing thoughts like, “You wouldn’t have had fun if you went.” “You’re not fun.” And it makes me feel like there is something wrong with me. Rationally, I know that I made the right decision to stay home but these thoughts are making me feel bad about myself.
Here is my model:
C: Husband and kids said they had fun on trip
T: You are not fun
A: Focus on the negatives instead of the many ways I am fun, beat self up, buffer to feel better, withdraw.
R: I am not fun
Can you help me create an intentional model for this situation?