Husband Issues

Hi, there are certain things my husband does that bother me very much. An example is that he stays out late at night several times a week and doesn’t answer his phone when I try to call to check where he is. This happens about 5 times a week and he eventually comes home after our 3 kids and I are already in bed. The truth is he has done this to differing degrees since I met him 12 years ago. I have talked with him about it countless times but nothing changes. We have also discussed it in counseling where he agreed to try but again nothing changed. It is apparent to me that I can’t control him and I can’t change him. I want to stay in the marriage but want to change my thinking so this doesn’t bother me so much. Advice?