I am struggling

Hi Brooke,

I have been doing SCS since January, and have made so much progress in learning how to manage my mind and my emotions. The struggle I am having is in my marriage (of 25 years). I started SCS with LOTS of negative thoughts/emotions about my husband and, b/c of my thought work, I am now more content, calmer, and feeling kinder and more fondness for him. But… I am struggling so much to actually feel love for him and also struggling to feel any feelings of attraction – both of which make it so very hard for me to want to have any intimacy with him (so we don’t – he is not a pushy guy about sex – but I know he wants and misses it). The lack of attraction is about the fact that he does not take care of himself, will not work out with me (I gave up trying to get him to years ago), and is at least 45 lbs overweight with a huge belly (and growing man boobs). Okay.. I know this is probably TMI, but since I can write anonymously I am just going to put it out there b/c I WANT to be able to get past how unattracted I am to him. I have NOT been able to come up with any thoughts that change how I feel at this point – I have made progress, but have now stalled out. I would appreciate your feedback on this.

I appreciate you!