I am a stay at home mom with two kids. I over react and feel angry when certain parents ask me for favors with rides or sleepovers for their kids. I struggle a bit because my immediate reaction (thought) when they ask for help is: I DON’T WANT TO. No matter if I can or can’t, and then I end up battling myself inside my head until I beat myself into helping. I’ve identified one thought:

If I don’t have a legitimate excuse (like an actual conflict) then I have to say yes – or else it will mean (I’m a bad person), (I’m not kind), (Karma – one day I’ll need help with my kids and I won’t be able to find help).

This thought makes me feel trapped and like I have no choice and I have to help. I’m having trouble coming up with an intentional thought pattern, because I don’t really know what I want the result to be.
Option 1- I help
So I can come up with a thought that makes me feel good about helping.
Option 2 – I don’t help
So I can come up with a thought that makes me feel good about not helping.

I guess this really has to do with the judgement I put on myself for having the thought “I don’t want to.” I am having trouble identifying the feeling I have when I think I don’t want to. I keep coming up with guilty, but that doesn’t seem right.
I think I just need clarification on where to go from here. Thanks!!