I Got The Proof

I never had a better proof that circumstances are neutral:

I submitted a book proposal for a contest two months ago. Yesterday came the email with the feedback and I opened the attachment on my phone while I was on the go.
What I read made me feel elated, everything was positive and cheering for my book and the characters and story.
I was with friends so I closed the phone after reading few lines and put it aside. From that moment I was walking on sunshine.

At the evening I came home and opened the attachment on my computer and realized the feedback they usually give always starts with the strengths of the proposal (what I managed to read on my phone), followed by a second page of the weakness of the proposal.

Bottom line: they passed on my book and had lots of criticism on the second page.

I felt like all my air came out with disappointment.

Then after few moments I actually smiled.
I realized how the thought I had all day (“that it’s so good and that they liked it”) made me feel so great while now my current thought (“they passed on my manuscript and said it’s not so good/not ready”) made me feel disappointed and deflated.

‘My brain is healthy!’ I thought. ‘It responds in a healthy way to situations in the world. I am not made of steel, I am human.’

Here I was with an opinion of one publishing house, telling me why they both loved it and didn’t love it, and that’s okay.