I keep yelling at my daughter

I have a full-time nanny who is currently on vacation and is coming back in a few days. I have not done my house chores and fed my kid daily for 2 years. I did all of that and one week of full-time work. It was very uncomfortable in the beginning but I finally sorted out my mind around it.

My 4 year old daughter is someone I can’t figure my mind around. She keeps pulling me, pushing me, poking me, startling me. I end up yelling over the day as I fear hurting me or her by mistake. I yelled at her so bad in the morning because my husband had said something mean to me. I apologized to her and my husband stating that it is not acceptable for me to yell. I calmed down.

But now I fear that she is going to sabotage my coaching career. My husband will never support me. I am going to fail miserably. It doesn’t feel good at all. How do I know yelling at my daughter won’t ruin her as a human. How can I do it right?