Are you willing to experience it all? OMG–what a good question. That is totally shining a light on the whole 50/50 nature of this particular situation, and yes, I can see it as an opportunity to coach myself and let ALL of the thoughts float around, and question them. You’re totally right–it’s OK to lose and mess up and do the wrong thing (even unintentionally), and I should actually welcome this kind of thing because it helps me to grow and learn.

But, man! Experience it all sucks! I hate feeling this way, but at the same time, it is interesting to sit with the discomfort and just let it be there, and remind myself that I am not going to die because of a feeling. It’s really reallly hard, mainly because I have been actively avoiding it most of my life. Ugh. I don’t want to feel this…but I am anyway…so I might as well really feel it, and learn from it…like, really learn from it.

Thank you for the reminder–I’m going to go deeper and FEEL the FEELINGS. I am learning, so THANK YOU SO MUCH for the help!