I had an impossible goal last year to get promoted to next level by Dec 31, 2019. It is not happening by then. If I get the necessary approvals, my promotion would be done by July 2020 (6 months later than my goal date)
I am glad that even though I am not going to be successful in achieving the goal by the time frame; by setting this goal I was able to push and challenge myself to lead projects. So now, I have enough artifacts to support my case.
But also have a ton of doubts –
1. Your case will get rejected
2. Your team mates don’t think high of you in terms of technical capabilities (I keep finding evidence for this), so they won’t support your promotion.
3. It would be awful if your promotion gets rejected after all this hard work.
4. you are inferior compared to others.

My models
C: I am doing a project
T: Your team mates don’t think high of you in terms of technical capabilities
F: demotivated
A: do distracted work. constantly spinning thoughts. Tell myself my work does not matter. waste time.
R: I produce low (quality) work / I don’t think high of me.

I am just tired of these thoughts. My brain wants an evidence (promotion) to prove that I am as good as my peers. How would you approach this?