Impossible goal / believe new things

My impossible goal for 2021 is “1,000,000.00 EUR in my bank account on January 31, 2022 by developing my coaching business and advancing my career in investment funds.”

Today, I have less money in my account than the day I decided on this impossible goal. I spent money on the certification to be a coach. I paid for proofreading services for my book, and the workbook that I wrote. I subscribed to another coaching program related to time management. I bought furniture for the apartment that I bought with my boyfriend. I bought two apartments to rent with my boyfriend and friends and that also requires paying for notary fees, construction, etc. I also paid for a surprise party for my boyfriend’s 30th birthday and quite a few other expenses.

I noticed that I am very anxious in the morning about all this because of the thought “I spent too much,” and I doubt a lot my goal. I realize that I even tend to blame my impossible goal for training me to spend too much… 😅
But when I see myself thinking like this I say to myself “no, I want to intentionally think that I will reach my goal, even if I don’t know how. I trust the process. I keep believing. The money comes easily. The million euros is on its way to my bank account.”

I am committed to continue to believe that everything is going well. I don’t have to restrict my spending and be afraid to spend because the money is coming and I need to focus on a creative mindset to generate more money.
My question is: is it the way to believe in new things and create a new result?

Right now it’s still scary. I’m afraid I’ll be in denial by thinking like this and I feel like I’m forcing these thoughts a bit. Is there anything I should be careful about in my thinking?

Thank you very much in advance for your answer.