Incentivizing choices

I have big goals for my business this month. They make me nauseous and scared shitless. I really want to go into buffering mode by shopping, watching YouTube, and not working on my business. I have done some models around this. I know those thoughts don’t lead to good action but they keep coming up a lot, and I keep trying to find thoughts to use to foster emotions that lead me to work.

I just decided to incentivize my tasks for the day. I get to buy little things that I have been wanting for planning by doing the tasks. I am curious if by incentivizing I am someone how avoiding feelings or avoiding thought work.

C: Plan for day for business.
T: You get 2 new pens if you do the number 1 task.
F: Excited (for the pens); I feel more neutral about the task now that it is just words on a paper and doesn’t mean much;
A: Do the task; not thinking about what this task means in the big picture just focusing on the immediate I get pens when I am done.
R: Task is done and I get pens.

I notice that incentivizing is changing my thoughts but when there is just the goal and the tasks I just think about the tasks and how they relate to goal.
C: Plan for the day.
T: Number 1 task today is making 25 contacts in order to make $3000 this month.
F: Nauseous, scared, resistant, pressured
A: Buffer: YouTube, shopping, organizing, thinking about all the things necessary to make $3000 that are impossible.

1. Is incentivizing my tasks preventing me from tackling my feelings about the goal, even though I get the tasks done?
2. I am not sure what the result is for the second model. I know that I have beliefs that the goal is scary, hard, impossible, and I don’t know if that should also go in the thought line.