Intentional Negative model


Hey looking to see if I’m on the right track with these models.

I’ve been dating someone for almost 3mos and a month ago we planned a road trip over my birthday weekend. He just told me that he made plans to meet friends that week at the same ski resort we’re going to. Our plans were to drive together Thurs come back Mondays.

He is now going the Saturday before and was going to drive back Tuesday. I pointed out to him that, that would mean he would be driving (6hrs) back on Thursday. So now he is going to just stay up there and I’ll drive up alone on Thursday. The past month he has been skiing with this friend almost every other weekend so I’m frustrated that last minute he planned another trip with his friend on top of ours that we have planned for over a month.

My unintentional model
C: boyfriend said he is going skiing w/friends same week as our trip
T: He didn’t think of me and doesn’t think our trip is important
F: rejected, neglected
A: say it’s fine and shut down
R: reject myself, he isn’t aware how I feel

Intentional Model
C same
T: It didn’t occur to him that he his plans would affect ours
F: disappointed
A: tell him I’m disappointed we wont be driving together
R: stay open and connected to myself and him.

I know I could make my thought more positive but I don’t want to, I want to feel comfortable sharing with him when I’m upset vs shutting down and not saying anything at all and just feeling resentful.

Thoughts?? Thanks!