Intentional Thought Help w/ Husband Model

My husband and I deal with issues differently. He is always looking to change the circumstance, while I understand the model and look to the thought driving the behavior. While discussing an issue regarding our daughter, we both had different views based on this…him parenting by wanting to change the circumstance and me trying to parent by recognizing the thought/feeling. I created this unintentional model.
C Husband wants to change circumstance
T This is wrong and a incorrect method to teach our kids
F Frustrated
A Argue and want him to understand the model
R This is wrong AND I am trying to change my circumstance, i.e., HIM
I know I can’t change him but it drives me bonkers! And I am also concerned about his teaching my kids that circumstances are the problem. A few intentional thought ideas would be helpful to get me to bridge the thought between frustration and even just neutrality.