Intuition or gut feelings directing me vs having my mind muscle through?


Hi and thanks in advance.
I am someone who is very intuitive and sensitive to life…situations, people, etc. For years I have often suppressed my intuitive or gut knowing/feelings in order to “get along”. This is a pattern from childhood. I figured out what others wanted and molded myself to their needs and unspoken “rules.” I feel I have mentally muscled my way through many parts of my life, being untrue to my own inner knowing…to the point that sometimes I believe others’ rules, follow along and avoid questioning them…leading me into situations that hold me back/limit me. I also see this is an inside job and that I need to fix it.

I have been working on this trait of mine, as I know and believe it doesn’t show me or support me in leading my best and happiest life on a deep level, and am struggling a bit. I joined SCS because I was drawn to the work around connecting thoughts and feelings and examining them. But I want to be sure its not “mind control.” My concern is that will doing this work, these Models, keep me locked into my mental, mind-controlled way of being which has not supported me? I do not want just my mind to run the show…I want my intuitive, felt senses to run the show too. I have a strong tendency to let my mind take over for me.

My question is this….how do I keep my intuitive and gut knowledge….which often comes to me like a feeling or body sense…strong and let it guide me? And not have this work here at SCS turn into mind muscling over matter? I am confused a bit because it seems like the Model stresses changing thoughts to change your feelings…whereas my feelings are often showing me my True North (to borrow a Martha Beck term), so I don’t want to ignore them by changing my thoughts/mind, which feels like my mind is doing the driving, not my inner knowing. I hope this makes sense.

Thanks