Is the thought serving me?

I’m hoping for clarity around the idea of a ‘thought serving me’. The model I’m working with:
C – boundary violation
T – I have nothing left to say that I haven’t already said.
F – truthful resignation + sorrow and fear of having to do hard things
A – implement consequence of boundary violation
R – Nothing more will be said.

NTs include
NT – there is always more to say
NT – things land differently when said differently, maybe *this* time he’ll hear it if I try again
NT – I sometimes have to hear things 187 times before, for no apparent reason, it finally lands
NT – love is unlimited tries

But I’m struggling with the idea that any of these NTs would be things that would serve me more/better than the OT. I’m afraid of perpetuating mediocrity by picking a better feeling thought. Can someone please remind me if there’s a basic set of standards for deciding if a thought serves you better than another? Thanks!