I’ve noticed that I…


My brain wants to type:
*I’ve noticed that I am always in a rush.
*I’ve noticed that I am not good at being present.
*I’ve noticed that I don’t like things being messy and I tend to buffer with perfectionist fantasizing (in the words of Kara Lowentheil).

I know that starting a sentence with “I’ve noticed that…” means whatever comes next is a belief that I just think is a fact.

I want to ask “how do I change it?” But I know how to change beliefs. I think I’m looking for some kind of shortcut. I’ve changed beliefs using thought work, of course, but it took time. I’d say it took a solid 3 years to feel settled in the new belief. For example, I used to think that my husband needed to change so I could be happy. Now I genuinely believe that if I’m not feeling happy, it’s on me and I can feel happy no matter what he does. That being said, this change in belief took time. (I even see evidence of my rushing belief here.) And I want to change my beliefs faster on purpose!

I know my beliefs CAN change fast. I believe two things: “Changing beliefs isn’t hard and I can do it fast.” And “changing beliefs on purpose is hard and not fast.” I think I believe that I can change beliefs fast and easy ON ACCIDENT. Like, if I hear an amazing new idea from a podcast episode, I can totally change my mind right then. That’s happened to me a lot. But when I TRY to change beliefs, I find it to take a long time and to be challenging. And I’m making that a bad thing.

I want to believe I’m not rushed, I’m good at being present, and I don’t buffer with fantasy planning. I KNOW I can change these beliefs, but I guess I want to change them faster than I changed the one about my husband.

I changed that belief by:
* Getting weekly coaching on it and tearing it down little by little like an old house
* Exposing myself to new alternative ways to think about it
* Choosing to think differently on purpose because I wanted to

Please coach me on being in a rush to change these beliefs (any anything else you see I need.) Thanks!