Hello coach,

I have worked for a company for 25+ years and have been trying to get promoted for the past 5 years. I have been in the same role for 12 years. I have taken courses and gotten credentials. I am in a support role now and want a management role. I have applied for several management roles and have not been shortlisted. After the last fail on a job I wanted, I decided I would try one more time with a job that I knew would become available this winter, noting that if I failed again that was it, I would not try anymore. I have been working towards getting ready for this job, learning everything I can, and anticipating applying for the job, being interviewed, and being successful. Today I heard that the job was about to be posted and that it would be one level higher than what I had expected. I immediately became discouraged and negative about my chances of being considered for this job.

I started thinking about the automatic negative thoughts that I have been thinking all along and recognize that it is these thoughts that have kept me in the same role for so long. I worked out the models below but still feel conflicted… I start to consider if I even want this job or if I would rather start planning my exit from this company.

Model 1
C: The job posting will be a P3 level
T: They’ll never consider me for this job
F: Defeated
A: I sabotage my chances by oversharing my doubts, I don’t put enough care into my resume and cover letter, I don’t proactively prepare for the interview.
R: They don’t consider me

C: The job posting will be a P3 level
T: I have a lot to offer in this position
F: Confident
A: I prepare my cover letter & resume to showcase my abilities; I reach out to people to share my ideas; I take on additional work
R: I offer my knowledge, experience, and can-do attitude confidently

C: The job posting will be a P3 level
T: I will be great at this job because it is a perfect fit for me
F: Excited
A: I visualize what it will feel like to be in this position; I prepare for the interview that I am sure I will get
R: I get shortlisted for an interview.

I have repeated this same scenario over and over during the past few years. I think I may just be afraid to commit to leaving this company.

Would love to hear your thoughts.

Thanks!