Just can’t seem to stick with it – Ugggggggghh


I listen to you every day. I have some really amazing days and then I have a day like yesterday where things just go off the rails. Is it that my why isn’t clear or powerful enough? My why right now is my wedding in 6 months.

My fiancé drinks a lot and gets sad when he sees me get all tense and tries to get me to unwind with wine. And I have a really emotionally tough job with a 1:20 min commute each way, planning a wedding, live far from my family, becoming a step mom to 2 beautiful girls who live w their mom an hour flight away…. and on top of that all we are planning to move to be with the kids and follow my soon to be husbands dream job…. but I will stay here for 6 months to finish planning the wedding and finish the year at Ky current job to get the bonus and equity pay outs. Anyway. Most days I feel overwhelmed and terrified about my next steps. What am I going to do for a job? How am I going to not fail as a step mom and wife? What if I don’t find a job? What if our wedding doesn’t go well?

All these emotions come up and I freak out and next thing I know I’m eating. I try to interrupt and do model work but there’s like this inner 14 year old b!tch that says “F that work, just eat. You deserve it.”

I realize I’m all over the board even with this question. Probably bc my mind feels all over the board.

Meditation? Journaling?
How can i use the 2-4 hours in the car to ground myself instead of hating it so much?

How do you recommend finding that powerful WHY that keeps me on protocol even with all those emotions?