Just me still practicing learning and studying

First we have to both study and learn before we are able to master. i choose to do THE YEAR OF DOING THE IMPOSSIBLE. Immediately, i discover some problems. Just the very fact of choosing this one indicates Unintentional Model. This is my automatic default going for the big break. Got caught with my hand in cookie jar stealing cookies. The IMPOSSIBLE things I do are not meant to be achieved. Say What? First bumping my head under the table. I must not set out to do an impossible with that sneaky snarky getting it done just because they say that it cannot be done. Oh dear me! I am completely lost. I cannot for the life of me think of one impossible thing to attempt. Assignment said 25. This is impossible to find the first list of 25 things impossible to not only list BUT also to go do them and fail at doing them.

It is absolutely discouraging to think of both listing and also doing 25 things that I know that I am going to fail doing them.

Here is my Intentional Model
C Life Controlling Problem
TI can learn to work through answers.
F incensed!
A I am doing the Living Free nine weeks training Insight Group learning to work through answers.
R I am taking back my power no negotiation.

Unintentional Model
C So what is new this clearly is a life controlling problem and for sure.
T Thank God for the training and the awareness.
F Disgusted
A Uprising I am drawing the line in the sand and this is my final word.
R I have Carpe Diem and shall run with it.

But this unintentional model came only after having done the intentional model.

This reminds me of one of my corny jokes Year 2006 talking with my Best Girlfriend at church. Sharing my hurting heart with her. I was so frustrated and destroyed because it seems that it was so easy to curse my husband out. I did it and said things that I was not even thinking and or saying when I already decide that I was riding on the higher road. It was just horrible. There is no way that I could live up to the standard that I willingly set for my own self.

Everyone reading this agrees that it is only right to refuse to relate to people who can only interact with you by offering a fight. Sorry Bully, I take a pass. It is my dignity to decide that I will not take a bit. And it felt so defeated that the only thing one knew how to do was to go ahead and take that bite. Unintentional Models galore (exploring that history).

Well my Best Girlfriend consoled me. She said that her girlfriend told her the best way to have the last word is usually to go ahead and to apologize. That seems to offer hope. We completed church services.  I got in the vehicle ready to apologize. I was going to apologize. I stopped and think. Do I apologize now or do I wait until after the next quarrel. Sad to say, I did not apologize then and have long since been waiting for the next quarrel. Oh dear me!

It is impossible for me to sit down spend time to make one list of 25 impossible thing to do. That is not up my alley.

Learning is also an A. Study is also an A. Mastery is R line

I am still figuring out and learning this thing. And I am scared of finding 25 x 4 impossible things to do. Those all would also have accompanying cost to doing them. That is IMPOSSIBLE one of them could be to go to Buckingham Palace. I actually dreamt that I went to Buckingham Palace once in a dream when I sleep (actually, i have that type of dream multiple times).

Ask a Coach do you see and learning and progression here in this question as I rambled out some of my thoughts?