Learn From My Coach Or On My Own

Happy New Year & New Decade, Brooke and SCS Team!

A Triple Diamond scholar here with a question:

My C: I hired a screenwriting coach to advise me on two projects I would like to write in the upcoming months.

My Thoughts about hiring him so far are:
— I paid him in full, in advance, and I believe him to be the best teacher I could have for this purpose.
— He sure comes across as someone who really understands storytelling for the screen from the inside out.
— He is very kind and generous with the information he shares.
— I will learn a ton from him.

The way we work is that I take few weeks to come up with ideas for a screenplay or two and prepare a pitch for him.
When I am ready, we have a call and I pitch the ideas, and he tells me what he thinks.

My new C of this coaching period with him is something like: So far I’ve pitched 17 ideas to my coach and he said, “Each one of them won’t work and here’s why.”

My automatic thoughts about this are:
— Now I need to start all over again.– It’s so hard to come up with new ideas.– Maybe I should be a yoga instructor or a hostess in a restaurant instead.
— This whole screenwriting thing is so hard.
— I’ll never get it right.
— He’ll always going to have something to say against my projects.
— Maybe I should just work on these projects on my own.– Maybe he’s wrong and my ideas are good?
— Clearly, I’m not good at this.
— I need a break/ ice cream.
— Maybe I should give it up.
— Maybe I’ll never going to make it.
— Because of his advise I haven’t written even one screenplay for two months.

These Thoughts caused me to Feel: Deflated, disappointed, frustrated, and worried.

And before I considered diving into the bucket of ice cream, I paused and felt these emotions and realized they are the cause of my biased and protective lower brain.
I interrupted all these Models that were going on and asked myself, ‘Is there any other more useful way that I can think of this?’

So I came up with some intentional and believable Thoughts:
— He explains very thoroughly why each idea doesn’t work.
— I am fortunate to have someone so knowledgeable to guide me and save me time and work of writing an idea that didn’t work to begin with.
— He’s doing exactly what I hired him to do.
— I see how useful the information he gave me is.
— I am so fortunate to have him as my coach.
— He explains things so well.
— I now have such a better understanding about the projects I pitched to him.– I learned so much about the craft of screenwriting thanks to these failing pitches.
— I can totally still write these projects if I want to.
— I am so lucky to be able to afford the money and time to hire someone to guide and mentor me on this craft.
— It’s such a great opportunity to have a wise set of eyes and ears to challenge me about my ideas.
— I can see where my ideas fall short or don’t work.
— This is a great classroom experience for me.
— I look forward to dive deep and spend focused and quality time into writing my best work this year.

When I think these Thoughts, I get to Feel: Grateful, fortunate, understanding, calm, at peace, and motivated.

But I do notice that I keep entering in and out of those states of my unintentional thoughts and feelings and my intentional thoughts and feelings.

Mostly, at the beginning of each working day, my brain falls automatically into the unintentional thoughts.
Then I need to go inside, dust it, tidy it up and put the right thoughts in place before I actually sit to do my work.

And today my brain purposed a few new questions:
What if all of this is too much work?
What if he’s not the right coach?
What if his advise is not the best?
What if you write something that is totally out of the box and this is why he rejects it, because it doesn’t fit like anything else he’s ever seen?
What if all the best and most creative movies and shows ever written were the ones that got rejected left and right but were later appreciated for their brilliancy?

So all these Thoughts create for me doubt in his advise.
And I notice that had I followed them, I will not seek to just lay back on the sofa, but rather run with my ideas and be very active about them.

So, I can see that these questions/thoughts by my brain will create a forward motion action for me to take lots of action and write regardless of what he advises, and thus, my Result will be that I teach myself whether my ideas worked or not.

So, overall, I don’t see that as a bad result, if I choose that.
Still, I feel conflicted about going his way or my way.

I come to this page after doing my own self-coaching, but perhaps there’s more than I can see.

With gratitude,

That Screenwriter