Learning to hide good emotions for fear of disappointment

I have uncovered during my work in scholars that over the past few years, every time I have felt a positive emotion I have masked it with either a negative or neutral one. I think I have been doing this for a few different reasons.

I went through a stage in the past where I was used to really feel my positive emotion, for example I got a new job and then I was super excited to start and then the job was awful. I feel that when I allow positive emotion in, I always have a follow-up negative emotion from missed expectations. As a result I have become very detached from my emotions. Most of the time I just think that I have built a wall around my feelings so that I don’t have to experience pain.

I did some work with my coach around this and she asked me if I want to break down the wall and instinctively, I think that I don’t as I don’t want to open myself up to feeling disappointed again.

Any advice?