Less people pleasing…More manuals

Hi! I used to be a huge people pleaser and I’m proud to say that is now shifting. I’ve been taking time to get more curious and journal about my own needs, wants, desires, opinions, feelings, and welcome it all. My own inner voice is getting a little louder, which is exciting to notice because for so long it was hard to hear.

What I’m trying to reconcile is how it used to be easier to not have manuals for others, or accept when they weren’t following them. However, now that I’m clearly identifying my desires my manuals are so much stronger! My guess is this means I get to practice feeling and tolerating more disappointment/frustration when I muster up the courage to share my preference with someone and there isn’t a want match?

Any insights on how to approach making healthy compromises instead of my old path of never speaking up or giving in and feeling resentful? I have a great opportunity to practice this coming up as I apartment hunt and move in with my boyfriend and we discuss how important commute time, number of bedrooms, financial breakdowns, etc. are to us. Thanks so much!