Letter


I have been doing some decluttering in the basement of our home. I went through some bankers boxes with old books that I hadn’t looked at in 10 years. While there I found letter I had received from a past boyfriend. When me and him were both single he never told me how he felt about me, but after a year of dating my now husband, the past boyfriend sent me this letter. He told me how much I had meant to him and also there were some very sexually explicit descriptions of things we used to do. When I got the letter I was pleased to have validation of how he felt (because it was very confusing for me at the time), but also fear because I knew my husband must never ever see this letter. It would be very hurtful for him and also he would see a side of me… the adventurous sexy side that doesn’t come out in our relationship…although I tried at the beginning of our relationship.
I didn’t know how to get rid of the letter so I hid it.
Now I have re read the letter, it feels more dangerous.
And now I have no idea how to edispose of it. I tried flushing a tiny piece of it for practice down the toilet and after the flush it still lay at the bottom. If I burn it it might set off the smoke detecter and because the text is written so closely if I shred it, the text will still be visible.
My goal is to see the letter in a neutral light because then I think I will be able to think more clearly about how to get rid of it.
But my feeling at the moment is danger.