Longing as An Indulgent Emotion

I’ve been trying to figure out why my business is still going slow, and stalling, and have identified this month a name for my indulgent emotion. I was previously calling it “hope” but it didn’t feel positive. It occurs when I do a bid on a major contract and put all my eggs in the basket and hope and wait but that potential contract doesn’t happen. It felt wannabe and sad and desperate all rolled into together. The best way to describe it is the word Longing. Where I long for something but feel helpless to make it happen. Sort of like when you’re a teenager and you have a crush on someone but you don’t know or think how to make it happen. It’s like I’m putting the thing up on a pedestal and me down below it. It comes with hope and excitement at first, then with no feedback or encouragement it quickly dies into a want or a longing. Here’s my model C: Work T: Maybe I will get the job I bid on and it will all be alright. F: Longing. A: Focus on past bids that I haven’t heard back on, follow up in a desperate way, not bid confidently on new work. R: Still only have a “maybe” opportunity, nothing concrete. My new intentional feeling I would like to have instead is pride. C: Work T: I’m making solid offers and getting responses. F: Pride A: Make more offers. Dwell in the future. Work hard at doing the work I win. Use that as samples to demonstrate my results, creating a stronger offer. Rest at ease that I have pride. And hopefully cash income as well. R: I do make more solid offers and take action on my responses. What feedback do you have on having Longing as one of the biggest emotions I want to avoid this year in my business? Using it as a big red flag that I’m stuck and not progressing. What about pride? Could I use this to set a goal to make x number of offers each week, until I have my workload filled to capacity with jobs I want? This month is amazing, categorizing emotions into categories and writing about them is generating really amazing insights, like how Longing brings me back to growing up as a teenager and getting all hung up on my latest crush. Thanks