Loving my sister conditionally


I’ve struggled to love my sister unconditionally for some time now. I’m trying and I’m definitely getting better but I still need help. I know those I find hardest to love are the ones I should try to love the most as I will learn about myself through doing so. This past Sunday my sister and I went out to breakfast. It’s not just this past experience we had, I usually always have the thought that she’s too loud when I’m around her. I think she talks and laughs too loud. I think she is unnecessarily dramatic among many other things in my manual I have for her. The funny thing is I think I’m too quiet and wish I talked more. Some insight into my models would be greatly appreciated!

Unintentional Model
C- Sister says words
T- She shouldn’t be so loud
F- Annoyed
A- Be short with her, not talk to her, judge her, get into other people’s models by thinking they’re judging us, wish we were sitting at a booth in the back of the restaurant, stare out the window
R- loving her conditionally

Intentional Model
(I learned my C and R can be the same when doing a model on my goals?)
C- Loving my sister unconditionally
T- I will love her unconditionally
F- Determined
A- Listening to her, asking her about herself and her life, totally present, not judging her, telling yourself she doesn’t need to change, not caring what others think about her, I let her speak uninterrupted, being aware of my thoughts that don’t serve our relationship
R- Loving my sister unconditionally