Loving what is and wanting something different

Hi there!

I’m working on loving my job and one of the things that holds me back sometimes is the tension between both loving it and wanting to do something different.

I’ve come to a place where most days at work I really enjoy myself, I like the work I do, I enjoy working with my team, etc. I’m super glad about that. I also hold on to a few little thoughts that make me feel resentful about my work:
I should be working in a creative field.
I should be working on something I love (I recognize love is a feeling, but I also feel like there are areas that I’m interested in that I’m not working in now).
I should be exploring my interests more.
I wish I could make money doing something creative, like design.
I should love the product that we sell more (because I want to feel connected to it, I want it to feel purposeful to work).

I see that these thoughts are sometimes killing my vibe about work, so I’d like to work to think something different, or to see these “shoulds” differently. These kinds of thoughts, when I believe them and use them to beat myself up, make me feel resentful and upset with myself for staying.

However, I also see that I’m holding on to them because I think that if I love my job through and through, including letting go of the idea of going into a creative field, or working on something purposeful, then I won’t quit.

I’ve heard the idea that I should love something before I leave it, which is why I’d still love to work on changing these thoughts. Could I love my job so much that it didn’t matter to me whether or not it was in a “creative field”? Could I love my job so much that it would be a hard decision to leave?

I’d love to get to a place like that. It would be so cool to know that whatever job I have, I can love it that much. But, I also want to make a move to go into a creative field. I’d also love to quit my job as soon as I think I can make money in a creative field or in a business.

Thank you for your help!