Hi Brooke, I need some help with a model, please. My son (8.5-year-old) has some emotional management challenges that require special help, so this is something I’m dealing with regularly. Even though I respond quite calmly, it can still take over an hour for him to calm down.

Unintentional model:
C: kid tantrum, he hits me
T: why do I have to deal with this?
F: frustrated
A: I tried to stop him and constrain his arms, and we spent an hour doing this before he calmed down and stopped.
R: I dealt with his tantrum

Intentional model:
C: kid tantrum, he hits me
T: I get to practice patience and unconditional love
F: patient
A: I tried to stop him and constrain his arms, and we spent an hour doing this before he calmed down and stopped.
R: I dealt with his tantrum
(It seems the A and the R would be the same? What do I do with the Intentional model?)
Thanks!