Manual of SIL / Stay with a thought and feeling vs. moving to a bridge thought


I’m trying to figure out how I *want* to feel about my sister in law, because right now and for the last year, I keep thinking I wish she were different (T). Is it possible that I just want to keep thinking that? And that I should just continue thinking that?

I have done countless models on specific situations with her as well as more general ones, like the two below.

I keep choosing to focus on her actions and decisions and feel so much disappointment and disdain. The reason not to think keep this up is that keeps me in a loop of negativity and focus away from myself (my R).

Are there some bridge models I could try on or should I just steep in my anger for a while until I really get sick of repeating my unintentional models?

UM
C Sister in law exists in the world
T I wish she were different
F Angry
A Think about how I wish she were different
R Don’t show up in my life like I want to

IM
C Sister in law exists in the world
T She gets to make her own choices
F Free
A Move on with my life
R Enjoy my life