Mate commitment

So doing a TDL and model – old brain says things like, “well if he thinks this or that then it means he’s not committed to me – which of course means – he’ll cheat.”

Basically – the thoughts I’m pulling out so far are not what I want to keep but they are the symptom of the thoughts below them running – I need help pulling out the thoughts underneath.

Could you give me some questions to help me or any suggestions to get to these probably unconscious thoughts. Like – I think part of it is that if he cheats – I leave so I’m sort of “running around” trying to make sure he doesn’t cheat.

But, if I don’t know if he’s cheating or not and he’s out with woman – how do I not assume the worst or believe in him, believe in our intimacy, believe in our commitment….

I’m sure someone would just say you just choose the T’s that create the Fs but I’m trying to get the deeper shit and clean it out…..