Mind turbulence regarding November 2020 coaching in Diamonds

I have come a long way in my relationship with my husband. I manage my mind and don’t expect him to change pretty successfully. He “reads” it as me ignoring him, “emotionless”, “ignoring him”, “don’t do anything together”. Basically, seeing my evolvement as a threat.

I get it, but these are not my intentions. I don’t ignore him, I just can’t talk to him about everything, but it’s not news – it’s always been like that. I fell madly in love with him and none of this mattered.

But he is not giving me the love I deserve and this finally became clear to me – his way of loving me is constantly make me a better person / wife / lover. I’m not dressed sexy enough, I don’t look as hot as I was, but “I love you any way”.

He is loyal, he doesn’t cheat, but none of this is ok with me any more. The last life coaching session in Diamond made it all clear.

I want to leave this relationship, but I want to come from peace and love and right now it’s not what I feel.

I’m in victim mode, I’m not interested in romantic relationships with him at all, I despise his parasitic life style (no or small financial contribution), no ambitions, but takes care of the animals, picks me up from work, and basically bother less.

I want to sit down and talk to him but he turns everything around and shuts me down.

I want to have a Good good bye.

I can’t imagine how it can work if it’s decided and still be with that person in one house without falling back or hating each other.