I went shopping for a dress today and was not able to find one that fit me and felt absolutely terrible. I could imagine how my mother and sister would react and make me feel horrible if they knew so I defended myself by thinking “I’m fine, screw you” and in an act of “defiance” I bought a brownie. From the moment I was walking towards the shop to eating to finishing it, I had the uncomfortable feeling of guilt and I could almost hear your voice and your podcasts in my head!!
My question is, although I still ate bad , is it a step in the right direction that I was able to think up a Thought Model afterwards (see below please) and was able to be conscious while eating it?
Thanks in advance for reading and please give me feedback on the thought model below.
I thought of the Thought Model and this is what I came up with
C-I can’t fit into a dress for an upcoming party
T-I am fat, useless. My family is going to make me cry when they find out. I’m okay though , screw them
R-felt silly because eating unhealthy is going to make me feel worse/continue not to fit into the dress.
Safer Thought Model
C-I didn’t fit into dresses today
T-I am going to go up a size in order to find the dress for my party but I am going to fit into a small size next time because I am on the quest to lose weight
R-be proud of myself that I turned a slip up into a positive