Model about NYE Date

Hi. I have been seeing a guy I’ve known a long time. This is my first holiday since getting a divorce after 30 years of marriage. He canceled our NYE plans, basically choosing something else he’d rather do.

Here’s my model:
C- Guy cancels our NYE plans.
T- No one ever chooses me first.
F- unimportant
A- Think about how I could have responded better to interest him more, hope he calls, overcheck my messages, wonder what he’s thinking
R- I don’t choose me or think about what I want.

My intentional model? I got a little lost here. Please help.
C- Guy cancels NYE plans
T- This might not be about me.
F- I’m not sure here. Less shame is what comes to mind but shame doesn’t match with my unintentional model.
A- Do other things- don’t spend all of my time and energy thinking about him.
R- Not sure here either.