Hello there –

I have this old issue with my father going waaaay back, and I’ve lifted the edges of it here and there with the Work but never quite released it entirely.

My father talks a lot about things he will do, things he should do, things he’s going to do, and then almost never does them. Some of these things are pretty serious and impact his health, mobility and ability to be warm in his home, but nevertheless it’s not something he actively censures himself for and I certainly do not want to be in his business on this score any longer.

So here’s a model – I feel like I’m not getting a big chunk of insight here and I’m wondering if you can offer tweaks or other scenarios that I might be missing?

Unintentional model

C: Dad decommitted to himself again on the ____________ for fourth year running.
T: He should keep promises to himself, he is unwell, he should embrace life and care for himself.
F: Anger, impatience, frustration.
A: Try to subtly nudge him toward action
R: I’m pissed, Dad still does nothing (duh).

Intentional model

C: Dad decommitted to himself on ________ for fourth year running.
T: He doesn’t know how to keep his plans. **** this is really the line I’m having trouble finding a fill for
F: Peace, love & compassion (This is certainly what I want to feel)
A: Offer support as able.
R: Less wasted energy and emotion.

Kind of an anticlimactic result. Why does this bother me so much?

Thanks,

SCD