Hello there!

I came to an interesting close in my TDL tonight, and in exploring it with Models, found myself having a hard time with the results. Details below.

TDL
Ex and I got testy with each other tonight over the titling of the car. He’s ready to get everything titled in whoever’s correct name and got upset with me for where I signed on the car title. Then of course I got upset for him getting upset with me and lost my cool and started snapping at him. I get frustrated when he asks me something, I tell him I don’t know, we/he should just ask the people who do know, he goes on and on wondering and speculating, and then I make a decision and he gets upset. I think I should just let him do his wondering and speculating–accept that that’s what he does–and not try to fix it even if it sounds to me like that’s what he’s asking, or I just want it to stop. Wow, seems so simple. I guess it probably is, I’m just not used to doing that.

UNINTENTIONAL MODEL
C: Ex said, “Every time I tell you to do something, you do just the opposite.”
T: That’s not true
F: angry
A: snap at ex, walk away, disengage from the conversation
R: I’m not truthful with myself — ?

UNINTENTIONAL MODEL
C: Ex said, “Every time I tell you to do something, you do just the opposite.”
T: I should just let ex do his wondering & speculating.
F: spiteful
A: disengage, don’t say anything
R: I’m left wondering & speculating how I can control ex’s behavior. — ?

INTENTIONAL MODEL
C: Ex said, “Every time I tell you to do something, you do just the opposite.”
T: This isn’t really about me.
F: comforted
A: Don’t take it personally, find the truth in what he says, acknowledge that he’s upset
R: ???

Thank you for your time, I appreciate your input. 🙂