Model Practice — Divorce

Good morning!

Thank you again for being here and offering your insights.

Here are my models for today, starting with my thought download:
I think Husband thinks I’ve changed my mind about divorcing. I know I should make it clear that I haven’t. I’m afraid to. It was hard enough the first time. He’ll probably get angry and throw a fit. Or break down begging & sobbing again. I guess I’m a people pleaser. I don’t want to make waves. I truly do see this time that I don’t want this relationship anymore — that I don’t want to settle for what I DON’T want. If I ever do have another relationship, I want it to be with someone who loves pets in the home. And cares about recycling. Cares for the Earth. I like to be in charge of my home, and maybe I don’t want to share it with anyone.

C: I told Husband on February 9 that I want to divorce.
T: I should make it clear that I haven’t changed my mind.
F: apprehensive
A: Continue showing my love for him. Don’t remind him of my plan to divorce. Don’t finish the divorce paperwork. Spin in guilt.
R: It isn’t clear that I want to divorce.

C: I told Husband on February 9 that I want to divorce.
T: I’m ready to go all-in on myself.
A: I determine how long it will take me to finish the paperwork, and share this information with him. I make the paperwork a higher priority on my schedule. I continue with my decluttering project, separating out our belongings and making this house my own. I make arrangements to get electricity run to the shop/economy apartment.
R: I make it clear that I want to divorce. I go all-in on myself. I show myself a love I’ve never felt before. I move forward with a very different perspective of myself and my life. I have my own back. I divorce Husband.

I have to add that the thought and feeling in my intentional model came as a complete shock to me, and I was flooded with tender emotion for myself. I joined Scholars in May because I was distraught about my marriage, but have immersed myself in other topics instead. Now that I am finally facing what I came here for, I believe I am experiencing a breakthrough that so many of your coaches talk about. All I can say is, thank you. Thank you so much for being here and helping to evolve us humans who are willing to listen and do the work.