Situation – an employee wants me to change the commission structure.

C – Employee says “Change the commission structure”
T – She’s asking for something she doesn’t deserve
F – Defensive
A – Avoid, have LOTS of conversations and arguments in my head, go into over-explaining what it’s structured the way it is, have thoughts about people pleasing, get resentful and upset, take it out on my family when I get home
R – I beat myself up, I hurt others, I feel way off track with who I want to be, how I want to lead, I experience feeling powerless and am totally frustrated and disappointed.

I can see I have a LOT of feelings and actions in my R line.

Intentional Model

C – Employee says “Change the commission structure”
T – I know the best way to lead my team
F – Clear and Confident
A – I lead, I respond to the email
R – I am leading my team, flexing and growing my leadership muscle

I can feel this is off. Neither one of my models feels totally accurate or on point, like I’m capturing what’s going on OR what I want to create.

Help and thanks!