Modeling ..with my family at the same time?

Ok, so I get it. I need to model thru my feelings to get to the underlying issues. So, when I’m talking to my husband and he starts telling me I’m ‘making me feel [fill in the blank]’ do I then say to him, “no, no.. here, let’s get a piece of paper and plug in your feelings to the model to see where YOUR thought came from..’ and we keep doing that back and forth? Is that how you and your husband learned to stay on your own side of the street, per se? Cause, I’m just learning and have no idea how to teach anyone else but he already gets it, uses it in business. Is that how we need to communicate with each other?