Money and the math of it

Hi Brooke!
So I’m diving into the Money Course here and I’m finding out a lot about myself. I’m at a bit of a standstill regarding what would I do with the money if someone gave me a million dollars. I wrote down how I would spend it and why. I’m finding myself not wanting to do the math of it, meaning I don’t want to figure out how much everything is worth, it seems tedious and boring. What am I making this mean? When I get to the part about having ten million dollars, I just can’t even go there, it seems like so much money that I wouldn’t even know what to do with. It’s an overwhelming amount that’s for sure. However, I have had a breakthrough regarding my thoughts about money. It’s both easy and hard which means that I never have enough in my bank account because I like stuff more than money. I also make very little in my opinion; however, I have ALWAYS had someone take care of me financially. Whenever I am in trouble, my father has always bailed me out, like when I moved to another city, he gave me money to live, I didn’t really have to support myself even though I did work. My mother paid off an outstanding bank loan, and I’m now in the process of paying her off. I have student loan debt as well.
Now I have a partner who pays for the mortgage and all the bills. I contribute to groceries sometimes but not often. This pattern is terrible and I’ve now realized the universe is challenging me. I know I will gain tremendous confidence once I begin supporting myself financially.
My goal this year is to make $60K in my business and that is pretty lofty for me. What advice can you provide moving forward regarding the math. Going through the money course is awesome so far but is bringing up so much of my negative thoughts around money that sometimes I just don’t want to even go through it….I am making myself do it because I know I will come out the other side with a more positive money mindset.

Thanks lady!