I have some major energy around my mother-in-law. Just never enough for her and my father-in-law. They have told me that they would choose someone different for their son. Its a long history and has caused so much pain. Anyways its Thanksgiving in Canada next weekend and I wrote her a message saying we would be able to make thanksgiving and that my lovey (their son) would be home. She responded with that’s great,you said you wanted to bring something for thanksgiving, so what do you want to bring?(c line)
T-I did lol? Mmm I didn’t remember that …as I truly didn’t say that.

For the record my in laws are millionaires and are the cheapest people you have ever met…We have fought over $8.10 its ridicoulous and it drives me crazy, as I complete opposite!

At the same time in our culture its an insult if you are asked to bring something. When you host, you host. Especially at a family’s house

F- why does she always have to be so sneaky and manipulative, why can’t she just ask me?

A- i got defensive and basically said um I never said that,so what do you need me to bring? She responded with salad or whatever

R- anxiety, anger and stomachache

I’m so over them. I try to keep the peace for my husbands sake..but seriously they make it so hard.

Everytime I feel we are making progress my husband will tell me things they say like “they are scared to come to the house to get the grand babies. Its pathedic. And this is all because My father-in-law called me dumb and I stood up for myself (nobody stands up to him). And he’s still hanging onto that from 4 years sgo.

Is my model right?

I tried doing another one…

C- same as above
T- i feel sorry for her that she can’t be genuine
F- compassion
A- calm
R-less anxiety

It helps for a minute and I get triggered and my blood literally boils….its so terrible. I know I have alot of work to do,

Thank you for your help! In much gratitude!! Xx