Here’s my thought download from today:

I want to enjoy my kids more than I currently am, and then I feel guilty when I don’t.
I make it mean that I’m a bad mom or there’s something wrong with me.
They just feel like tasks to me. I feel like there are so many things I have to make sure they get done. Often, I feel so much better when I’m not around them, and I feel pretty awful for feeling that way. I don’t know how to be relaxed around them, go lucky, carefree, teach them, help them, be the mom. I often find them loud, and obnoxious.
I enjoy them so much more one-on-one. When all three are together it feels crazy to me. Kate makes things crazy.

Not sure where to begin. Help?:)