My husband

Hi Brooke!
Thanks for all of your help and insight. I have a question. So I want the kid’s room painted (and my husband agrees that they should be painted as well). I don’t want to paint. I asked my husband if he would paint and he said that he didn’t want to either. Okay, so my friend likes to paint and is willing to do it and I plan to pay her. My husband does not think that we need someone else to do it. So how do I handle this now? I still plan to hire her. I just plan to have her show up and not say a thing to my husband until she is there. Is this wrong? I did what I was supposed to….as for help getting my needs met and he chose to not meet my needs so I am going to take care of it myself. I don’t want to tell him because I feel that he will talk me out of it and I don’t want him to be mad at me.
Overall I am afraid that he will “steal my happiness” when I tell him things that I know that he doesn’t agree with. He wants me to have hobbies like fishing, hunting, etc. and I don’t want those hobbies. I am perfectly happy just hanging out at home, with my kids and with my sisters and using my money to pay for the things that I don’t enjoy doing such as painting. We don’t share banking accounts and each pay for our own things but I am still afraid to tell him things. I don’t want to have him putting what I like down. I am getting better overall with listening to him and saying “i’m sorry you feel that way” and it feels amazing. Is that what I should do with the painting situation too?
Thanks for all of your amazing work!