My husband’s emotions

I can’t control my husband’s emotions. I know this. He can be Moody, short with our kids, and in his head too much. I try on thoughts like, he needs to feel this for some reason, he’s just experiencing his 50% and that’s ok, he’s the perfect dad for our kids, he’s doing his own work on himself and it’s ok if it’s a different process from mine. … I believe these thoughts. I intentionally focus on them, but I still struggle with the need to “make” him happy. I realized today that I do that to make myself feel better. So what is the alternative to trying to make him happy so that I feel better inside? I find that I love him and don’t want to change him, but I personally don’t want to be around someone that chooses these emotions so regularly. So what’s left? If I’m dropping my manual for him, but also want to respect myself…. What can I do?