my mother interferes with my spending


I have been earning my own salary since I graduated from college. My parents never paid my college tuition and I repaid it with work and student loans. I live with them and I contribute by paying a fixed rent for the past few years and by buying things for the household.

My mother has been interfering with my spending especially during the holiday season. I only bought one clothing item and she kept demanding the price of it and telling me how spendy I am. I feel like at 29 years old, I have the freedom to spend my own money and to me, buying one expensive (around 500 dollars) for Christmas is not too big of a deal. Am I wrong about that? Then why did I secretly feel ashamed and defensive when she said how spendy I have been with my money?

Growing up in a traditional Asian household, I take care of parents in every aspect of their lives and I have bene an obedient child to a very strong personality mom. Can you tell me what’s going on here and how can I feel confident with my spending decision and wear the item with pride?