Nephew is in jail

Hello, I have a very dear nephew (that I love as my own son) incarcerated. It’s been a month already, I have cried a lot and feel that the sadness if finally going away. I wish I could say I’m accepting reality but there are so many thoughts around this situation, I picked one of the many that I want to process. Can you please help me find a thought and feeling to drive a different result? Thank you!!

C: Nephew is in jail

T: It is his parents fault they’re so stupid and irresponsible
F: anger
A: Rescue him because I’m the hero
R: Spend the money I’ve saved for my own kids in lawyers (I become the stupid and irresponsible)

A: Trust his public defendant and the justice system
R: I accept reality as it is