New Belief is not scary..should it be?

Hi Brooke,
My new belief does not provoke feelings of anxiety and fear in me. Infact, ” I am 120 lbs by allowing urges” feels exciting and fresh since I finally feel like I have a path. So every morning, I feel super motivated and committed. This feeling is invigorating and front and foremost at the beginning of the day.
However, I have NOT been allowing urges for the past days.
So I seem to be doing the work backwards. My alternate thoughts are “You never follow through. You haven’t done this consistently. You always break your promises.”
I do the massive action on the opposite of the alternate thoughts?
You never follow through. …. I follow through today.
You haven’t done this consistently…. I start now.
You always break your promises. … I do the 100 urges TODAY.

Thanks so much.