I helped find an awesome sales guy for our company to run Europe. He is actually very good, but a total brown noser. He’s constantly looking for validation and kudos and sticks his nose in my territory where it doesn’t belong. I have conflicting feelings and this is annoying more than it should but I am trying to use the salary from this job to fund my coaching business so I’m not really too motivated with my territory so it’s causing some guilt for me. Trying to do models (I am new at it), I can always define the emotion but can’t really get a clear picture in the thought. Part of me thinks it’s my guilt
For not being present in my day job like he is, he’s a reminder of that …

C – new sales guy is over eager
T – here Tom goes again offering up a sales idea I was already working on
F – feeling threatened and annoyed by new sales guy, makes me feel icky
A – motivates me to follow up more but doesn’t feel good. I feel icky
R – ?

C – I am working a day job that doesn’t fulfill me anymore to fund the growth of my coaching business
T – I should be putting more effort in like Tom
F – guilt for not doing my job to the best of my absolute
A – forced action in a job I hate
R – shitty sales results and Tom looks better then me

I don’t want him being better than me but I don’t want this job to be my main focus – I know I can’t have it both ways, it’s already very challenging to juggle both (that is fact, not thought), I have the kids, husband, day job, coaching business –
It’s a lot