What if I have many thoughts and/or feelings about the same circumstance? Do I create a model for each thought and feeling? If so, wouldn’t each one have an unrelatable action>result?
Can a model not have a circumstance? I mean, if I identify a thought or emotion that comes with many different circumstances in life, can I do the model without a particular circumstance?
How do I know when I should put something in a circumstance or thought? For instance, I have a new baby and since he was born, I am unable to organise my schedule as I could when I wasn’t a parent. Meaning that I do not know what time of the day he will take a nap and when he does, I don’t know for how long. Therefore, I cannot plan my day. I know I cannot control if-when-how long the naps will be so that I can plan my day, so that sounds like a circumstance, but also sounds like an excuse thought?
I’ve heard Brooke talk about “let adults be who they are” or “the manual” which I understood to be the same thing… But in relation to people in my life that I cannot “divorce from” such as my children, how can I manage my thoughts/feelings around their behaviour if these are genuinely hurting me and I must choose it to feel hurt. For instance, if my son becomes a drug addict, I cannot feel neutral about it and I will want to change the situation. How would I use the model to feel better about people I really care, but who don’t want my help or don’t want to change?
I hear Brooke talk about “Massive Action” a lot and saying that this doesn’t mean being busy or working too much. However, if I want to make more money, to me it means I must sell more, therefore I do need to spend more time on my business to do those sales calls/meetings/networking PLUS do all the other things I do to run my business, etc… Wouldn’t a massive action like this, for instance, automatically increase my workload?
What if I want to reduce a buffering, rather than stopping it completely? For example, I’m not an alcoholic or overweight person and I have a habit that doesn’t compromise on my overall wellbeing which is sugar. But sugar gives me pleasure which I want to keep in moderation. How would I use the model to moderate my consumption rather than stop? Even if I conclude that I want to complete stop at some point.
How to spot the automatic behaviour of replacing a negative thought by a positive one that I want to believe but I don’t? How can I make it neutral? Is there an “equation” to transforming a negative thought to neutral? Sometimes I find it really hard.