New to SCS – model question


Brooke,
I just joined SCS in February and haven’t been as consistent as I’d planned to be with this work. I spent most of March dealing with the illness and recent death of my father, from whom I’ve been estranged for 10 years. My issue I’m working on is overeating / weight loss. I’ve used the death of my father as an excuse to go completely off plan in the last 3 weeks and have gained about 7 lbs back again (had lost nearly 40 in the last year since starting to listen to your podcast along with Katrina’s and cutting sugar and flour / doing IF). I’ve had people telling me to be kind to myself, which I took as license to eat whatever the hell I wanted and stop exercising.
I started listening to the March podcasts a few days ago and did the Blame one yesterday and it resonated with me, especially the part about being a people pleaser and trying to make everyone happy. My Dad was an alcoholic and as the oldest child, I always felt it was my responsibility to keep him happy – it helped me to hear you say that doing that was taking responsibility for his actions and not the right way to think about it.
I modeled my thoughts for the last few weeks – please let me know if you think I have any of this confused (since I’m new to modeling).

Unintentional model:
C: My father died.
T: That gives me the right to eat whatever I want because I’m sad and I deserve it.
F: Guilt
A: I eat more / exercise less.
R: I feel even worse / gain weight / don’t progress toward goal.

Intentional model:
C: My father died.
T: I’m sad, but eating won’t solve that.
F: Motivated (even if still sad)
A: I eat on plan and exercise
R: I get back to weight loss / feel empowered

Thanks for all you do!