Not Better There Than Here

One of my dreams & “impossible” goals came true a few days ago: my partner of 4 years asked me to marry him.

I was shocked as I literally have worked through the marriage topic for a few years & decided a while ago to choose to love him no matter what, whether we got married or not. I was really happy until he said, “It’s my gift to you because I know how much it means to you.” I’m not even sure I had a thought – but when he said that – I felt a punch in the gut. I feel as though I am a gift to him as well and the comment made me feel like he was doing me a favor yet didn’t really want to marry me.

If you have any suggestions as to what to do, I’d love some guidance.

The thing I wanted finally happened and because of his comment, I feel sad. He is upset with me because I’m not ecstatic and said, “You should be happy. What is wrong with you?”

I did my best to explain & had an honest conversation with him — even after doing the thought work. Now I feel like I’ve ruined the experience.

Help would be great.