Not deciding ahead of time


Hi All,
I’m digging a little deeper on my procrastination issue. I think some of the reasons why I don’t want to decide ahead of time and commit to a plan or a schedule are: 1) something better might come up so I should keep my options open, 2) what if there’s an emergency and I’ll have to change my plans, 3) I might not feel like doing what I decided previously, 4) I always forget things (i.e. my plan isn’t complete) so I’ll have to change it anyway, or 5) I make completely unrealistic plans that I can’t follow even when I try. I see these are all excuses to not plan or, if I do, to not follow the plan. I think this means I can be free and spontaneous and can do what I want when I want. But I’m also weighed down by all the things I haven’t done. Here’s an example.
C: Taxes
T: I really don’t want to do my taxes but I also don’t want to rush around like a maniac at the last minute.
F: Indecisive
A: Consider putting Do My Taxes on my calendar for Saturday 2-4pm but also consider all the other things I could also do on Saturday afternoon. Consider Sunday morning. Consider every afternoon next week. Can’t decide. Don’t commit.
R: Feel burdened by indecision and taxes still need to be done.

I’ve tried the thought “I am committed to doing my taxes on Saturday at 2pm no matter what” and my brain says – well not if I’m sick, not if my dad needs help, not if there’s an emergency, etc. More excuses I know – but I still don’t commit. I’m sure I can do my taxes if I sit down and focus. It won’t be fun, it might even be horrible, but so what. That’s not the issue. It all seems so ridiculous – what am I missing?